Angel Tree with the Least of These

~crossed posted from Salvation Army Tulsa Blog~

My daughter is a 'least of these'. She's actually my foster daughter and has been in DHS custody for over a year; she and her younger brother have been with my husband and I since July of this year. They were placed with us about a week after I started my job as a grant writer here at Salvation Army. These kids are hilarious, fun, exhausting and challenging; we love it, but we are finding that we have to be very intentional about teaching them "Life Lessons,"while we can.

My husband and I have always shopped for Angels off the Angel Tree in the past, usually one for him- a boy- and one for me- a girl. This year, we have 2 little ones to buy for already, but I was loathe to give up tradition. So this year, I decided to include our foster kids.

We made it out to the Angel Tree kickoff at Promenade Mall. At age 5, Miss M (as we call her in blog-land) was unimpressed with the kickoff in general--too loud. But she did like the girls' singing group, MP3, in their matching outfits and "shiny hair."

MP3 girls group at the Angel Tree Kickoff (11/17/12)

After Kickoff, we picked out a Angel from the big tree, just her age, named "Lisbeth" and set off to pick out some gifts for "her Angel."

At first, she did a great job of picking out toys. She "ennie meenie mineie mo'd" between which Baby Alive doll 'Lisbeth' was to get- Hair Salon Baby Alive or Magic Meals Baby Alive.

Hair Salon, duh.

But she struggled a bit with stocking stuffers, as we picked out Hello Kitty stickers and pencils and Disney princess playing cards. I gently asked her if she was picking out things for herself or for Lisbeth, and she admitted they were for her. But soon we were back on the right track.

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Every time we added something to the bag, we would talk a little about what we were doing and why. In my own blundering, non-parental way, I tied to impress on her how it is important to share what she has, to be grateful for those who love her and that there is always someone who has less than you do.

M's letter to her Angel

Miss M is pretty smart, but I think the literal and logistics of the Angel Tree, may have gotten blurry during our conversations. She asked me, the day I went to take the Angel Tree bag in to work, "How will she get them {the toys}, up in Heaven?" I stifled a giggle and tried to explain that our "Angel" was a real girl, just like her, and that she needed extra toys and we were like her personal Santa! How fun!

Santa, she understood.

And boy, I felt like Santa, when I went to check in and shelve Lisbeth's Angel bag.

I walked past row after row of shelves, 3 levels high, with toy bags packed in, till I found Lisbeth's family bag.

Turns out, she's the youngest of 4 girls. And her bag was the last one to be added to the families' bag. Those lovely little girls would all get all their hearts desired, thanks to people they didn't know.

As I marked the bag tag with a big "C" for  "Complete," I felt the warehouse dust prick my nose. And eyes. Lots of tear-inducing dust in the warehouse.

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 And I don't know about you, but I've been near tears many times since (including today, as I wrote this post), thinking about the poor babies in Newtown, Connecticut. So close in age to Miss M and Lisbeth and so many of my friends' kids. So close to Christmas. Lodged in our hearts and the back of our throats.

But as a donor said to me this afternoon, as I took her donation for the Angel Tree over the phone, "it's the least I can do for kids in need, especially this Christmas."

So, do what you can. Shine a light in the dark. There is always someone more in need than you. Miss M can attest.

--Vicki

Birthdays & other celebrations

We've been operating on radio silence for the past few weeks here at the blog, not because nothing's going on but rather, the opposite.

I've been overwhelmed by how much we are still actively engaged in getting the kids settled in. Particularly, Miss M.

Just this last week, we:
Met with Baby A's physical therapist
Approved a visit with the kids' Papa
Went school uniform shopping (Kindergarten for Miss M!!)
Went school supply shopping
Bought birthday presents
Ordered cake & sandwiches
Registered Miss M for school
Met her teacher
And scheduled an appointment for M's physiologist to come to the house.

Oh yeah, and spent Thursday morning at the Urgent Care, because both the kiddos have upper respiratory infections.

Which they did not get from me, although I've been sick too. First with strep then with ragweed allergies. And since I was not EVEN aware that baby's cant get strep, we spent 2.5 miserable hours at Urgent Care. (now taking pediatrician referrals, thanksverymuch).

So yeah. Been busy!

Then we had M & I's joint birthday party on Saturday at our neighborhood pool (rescheduled from late July, when I was in the throes of strep). And although we got to swim & had cake & presents & were surrounded by friends, family, etc., I had to laugh when a drought-ending thunderstorm rolled in & broke up the party (but only 30 minutes early)!

Crazy.
Wild.
Thrilling.
Exhausting.
Hilarious.

That's our world with Baby A & Miss M.

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We couldn't do it without help & support from our friends & family.

Thank you for all the hand me downs of clothes, of toys, of jumper roos, of pink shoes for a little girl you've never met.

Thank you for the words of wisdom, for the hugs of encouragement, for engaging with the worlds bossiest little girl, for smooching on that baby, & for understanding when I call in sick.

Honestly, these kids have made question my own sanity & reasons for EVER wanting kids of my own...BUT either way, I'm so amazed by this community of church friends, neighbors, in-laws, old college roommates, grad school drinking buddies, longtime friends & virtual strangers that are supporting us in this fosterhood journey.

You are awesome.
(Please don't stop!)

Respite

It has been 6 weeks or so since DaBoys went home. In that time, we've seen them twice- once to drop off their bikes & once because they needed picked up from day camp unexpectedly. I'm just really thankful that their mom considers me someone she can call in an emergency; it's a good sign.

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Today brought an unexpected situation: we were asked to provide respite care for another foster family, for the weekend. I got a call about 3:30, while I was wrapping up my first full week at my new job (woo!).

The worker explained the situation (foster mom health issues), the kids' ages (4 & 18 mo.) & asked if we could help out. I immediately wanted to take the kids (their situation is very sympathetic), but thought maybe I should consult with Mr. Greg first.

Of course, easygoing guy that he is, he said yes. Before I know it, I'm getting the foster dad's info and arranging a drop off.

They showed up around 7; high chair, pack n play, Barbies & booster seats in tow.

The foster dad had very kindly written down bedtime instructions & helpful hints, and even left his cell number.

The kids settled in pretty quickly. The girl, 4, who I'll call Lady M (very pretty, witty & wise), played with Lola & explored the whole house, while I sorted through Baby A's diaper bag, in search of a changing pad. Finding none, I used an (old, forest green) towel & soon set him to rights.

We played for a bit, then I fed Baby A a bottle & put him in the Pack N Play to sleep.

He wasn't having it, so Lady M "read" him a story & we tried again.

Success!

Lady M drew for another little while, then put on her jammies & brushed teeth; then I read 2 books & rocked her (per instruction sheet) & put her to bed. She was out, stuffed unicorn tucked under her arm, in 10 minutes.

Hope the rest of the weekend is this easy!